I haven’t been writing lately. There have been a million excuses, including sickness and LTYM and, you know, laundry. Oh and maybe a parasitic invasion but you’ll have to wait for my Listen To Your Mother talk to hear all about that. I’m sure you can hardly wait.
When I don’t write, I start to have this itchy feeling under my skin, without even knowing why. Robb and I bicker. The kids’ voices sound whinier. I don’t feel like doing anything but eating chocolate-covered macaroons.
I think every March I get into this rut. Especially on those cloudy snowy days after a few days of nice weather. Colorado is like, oops sorry! Did you think it was spring-time? Nope. Hang on, we’ve got some more snow coming!
But today the sun is shining. The macaroons have all been eaten. I decided to drink some highly caffeinated tea instead of take a nap with my daughter. The laundry is done. At least until everyone starts changing their clothes again.
So I sit in the sun and I write.
And I would like to tell you a story.
Once upon a time there was a young mom (just go with it) who wanted it all. She wanted a clean house all of the time and happy children and a flourishing writing career and a healthy marriage and amazing friendships and to be able to exercise whenever she wanted.
WELL. One day, a dragon came to her house. This dragon’s name was probably Jim-Bob or something. I think he was a country kind of dragon. Anyway this dragon said, that, if the young mom (yes, young) wished for all of those things, that she could have them (Yay!). But. She just couldn’t have them all at the same time. She had to decide which one’s were the most important to her and only choose three at a time.
At first, the mom decided on her children’s happiness, a healthy marriage, and a writing career. But then her house went in the crapper, she got fat and forgot about her friends.
So then, because she still really wanted it all, she decided to clean her house and go for a run and drink wine with her friends. But then her kids were crabby and she couldn’t write and she bickered with her husband (because he wanted her to write and follow her dreams). You get the idea.
It was all going to shit. Nothing was in balance and she could never decide what the most important things were. She was trying SO HARD to be everything for everyone but she just couldn’t. She couldn’t be perfect.
So she went back to the dragon and said, “Dragon, I wish for more. I want to have all of the things. All of the time.”
Jim-Bob said, “Okay. But it might not be as great as you think.”
The mom went out into the world and she had it all! She had perfection. Happy kids, a healthy marriage, a great career, exercise, wonderful friendships, an immaculately clean home. It was great.
Because, actually being perfect was sort of boring.
Because if you’re perfectly clean, you don’t find a mouse nest in the glove box of your car and that kinda makes a great, if somewhat disgusting, story.
And if your kids are perfect, they don’t crack you up by being complete little shits some of the time.
And if you have an amazing career where you never make a mistake or get rejected, well then it’s probably not going to feel as great when you DO get what you want.
And if you’re the perfect wife, you can never have that hug when you finally both say you’re sorry and that hug can be the absolute best part of your day.
And if you don’t get to exercise whenever you want, you will appreciate that time SO MUCH that you might just go a little farther than you would have.
And if you can’t hang out with your friends as much as you want, well, again the wine never tastes as good as it does after a long break, with gossip and the women that you love.
So, the mom went back to the dragon and said she wanted to have all of the mess of her life back. She decided that she would juggle it all. Badly. With moments of genius.
Because perfect is boring.
If you know your thing, do it. If you don’t know your thing, figure it out. Because a world full of itchy-skinned perfect people seems like a bad idea.