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Dear Daniel Tiger,

I love you. I do. You have taught my child to “Keep trying, You’ll Get Better!” which successfully stopped her from turning into the Incredible Hulk that one time when she couldn’t get her underpants on in the right direction.

And your advice to count to four, “When You Feel So Bad You Want To Roar”? Pure Genius. I’ve used this technique myself many times. I would even say that, in the hours between my older child getting home from school and my kids’ bedtime, I’m either counting to four or rocking in a corner somewhere.

I do have some concerns that I would like to talk to you about, however. First off, why is your mom the only one wearing pants on your show? Truthfully, the pants-less thing is a pretty accurate depiction of my own home, but I think you, as a role-model, should be demonstrating pants-wearing. It really would make my life easier.

And the songs. They are catchy, I’ll give you that. But, oh my god, the songs. They are the ear worms that I can never get out of my head. They follow me everywhere. And people really do look at me strange when I start singing to my child in the grocery store, “Germs, Germs Go Away” as I wipe the cart down. This is both because I am a terrible singer and because it’s pretty lame to sing to your kid in the grocery store. But I can’t seem to stop because the songs are ALWAYS there.

To survive your songs, I find myself occasionally making up new words to them when my children aren’t around. These lyrics are usually inappropriate, and because you are a preschooler, I won’t share them with you. Lets just say there are a lot of things that rhyme with Duck, and the song, “Give a Squeeze Nice and Slow” can be a grown-up song too.

I enjoy your show, I do. It gives me many minutes of freedom, probably more minutes than the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends. These minutes allow me time to indulge in my own interests, like, bathing and using the bathroom. And, on occasion, I feel like you are doing a better job at raising my kids than me. But right now, my daughter won’t ever actually use her words unless I sing the song, “Use Your Words,” and this is just making my life harder. And that’s not we want, right Daniel?

Because “Friends Help Each Other, Yes They Do”, I just want to remind you that the kid from Super Why? is a pretty consistent pants-wearer and Dinosaur Train is breathing down your little red sweatshirt with all those dinosaurs and…trains.

So let’s throw some pants on and take the songs down a notch m’kay? Thanks.

Yours truly,

Moms Everywhere

If this makes you happy, then you should be overjoyed to know that I’m on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter and even Pinterest!

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8 thoughts on “An Open Letter To Daniel Tiger…

  1. As someone who has worked in a variety of areas with young children, I get your frustration. I also make up words to kid’s songs… my favorite is “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Skyscraper Car,” which I made up for a little boy who wanted me to make up a song about, well, skyscraper cars? I also try to keep a running repertoire of grown-up songs in the back of my head in case one of those ear worms start trickling in. It helps, sometimes.

    The no pants thing is so weird. The no shirt thing too. If Mickey and Donald shared their clothes, they’d only have one full outfit between them. I wonder how much the cartoon lack of clothing encourages kids when they go through those phases when they don’t want to wear clothes at all, or only wear their underpants. Thank goodness that phase doesn’t last forever, right?

    1. joellewisler says:

      Thanks for reading Charlene! And, it really would be helpful for all the cartoon characters to just put some freaking pants on! There must a reason?

  2. Susie says:

    Oh God this made me laugh! Thank you!! And, I did need the laugh too.

    1. joellewisler says:

      Thanks Susie! And good, laughter is good.

  3. Still cracking up about “Give me a squeeze nice and slow”. 🙂

  4. Leeuh says:

    LMAO!! Daniel Tiger just went off here. 🙂

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